I hosted the baby shower with no issues. I even started my period two hours before the first guests arrived. I got a tiny bit sad during the gift opening (I refrained from oohing and aahing over every cute baby item, thinking that if I started letting myself gush over how cute things are, that might break down the wall of emotion), and I left the room to go sit with a different group of friends when the conversation turned to exchanging ultrasound and cervix and labor stories. Even though I actually could have contributed some ultrasound experiences, I really didn't want to talk about infertility struggles.
Later, I asked my husband if he got sad at all (since the shower was co-ed, he was there during the gift opening too), and he said a little during the gifts, thinking "we'll never need that...or that...or that" but then he thought of what we do have, and then he was better. Aw!
A year ago I would have been a mess even attending a baby shower, so I'm definitely proud of the progress I've made that I could not only attend one, but actually host it. This isn't to say that the next time I'm invited to a baby shower that I will definitely go, but I'm not a definite no anymore.