Monday, March 4, 2013

It's been a while

Time has flown by.  The school year is 3/4 of the way done; our summer "we don't have kids" trip is planned (just need to actually book it).  This year is San Francisco, and we have a lot of things we want to do, so it's looking to be a full five days of activity.  The only things we haven't looked into yet are restaurants.

I'm doing really well with the no kids things...even back to where I used to be that I can think a kid is cute and want to play with him or her.  I still have some dark days where I feel left out, but those are very few now.  I have a friend who is currently pregnant, and I'm so excited for her.  So far, there hasn't been any awkwardness and she hadn't stopped sharing details with me.  That has happened in the past, and I'm still not sure how it could have been avoided.

I'm starting to come out of my hermit hibernation.  Someone said something in a post recently about expecting bad comments from people.  I think that's what I was doing, and I thought that if I stayed home, I could avoid them.  While this is true, I was also avoiding a lot of fun activities.  So one of my new years' resolutions was to socialize more.  I'm still VERY content to stay home, but I'm forcing myself to go out.  And it's been pretty good so far.  I've come a long way so that I don't expect there to be awkward moments anymore, and there really haven't been any.  Of course, I've grown a thicker skin since then, so that may be part of it.  And I still avoid the people who I found to be not quite so supportive during my time of need, even though I realize now that I share some of the blame for not asking for what I needed.

I feel like I am making progress; I just hope that other people can see it too.